Tuesday 23 August 2011

Masculinity

Ever since Will was born and looked like, well like a prune, people have told me how masculine he is. How boy-like his features, face, body is. I never really got what they meant but always smiled sweetly and said thank you. I mean, he is a boy so that is a compliment right?

I have always been a big fan of the 'nurture versus nature' argument because it really is so inconclusive and circular and fascinating.  But I think I always thought that nurture had the edge. I believed that people brought up well, in good homes, by good people setting good examples turn out to be good people.  I still believe that (and love how eloquently dweej puts it here) but since having Will I have seen what a powerful force nature is. It has blown me away just how much of a boy William is. It is in his blood like I would never have believed possible. (beautifully illustrated here).

I don't work so from the day he popped out, Will has been with me and just me. We go to playgroup sometimes, he sees other kids occasionally and obviously Daddy at the weekends but I am pretty much his world.

I am a girl. Obviously. I am not especially girly but I hate sport. Passionately. I am terrible at it so that might be why or perhaps I am terrible because I hate it. I am past wondering or caring. All I know is that if a ball is heading in my direction I turn and  run in the other direction. And more often than not cry. I hate them that much.

So it baffles me that all Will wants to do ALL day, EVERY day, is play with balls. Kick balls, throw balls, catch balls, hit balls.

He loves steering wheels, cars, tractors, fighting, thrashing, running and have I mentioned balls? The kid is OBSESSED.

It goes against my nature to encourage all of these things but I do because they make him so happy. I am nurturing his nature.

I always wanted a boy but I had no idea just how much of a boy I would get. Every day he surprises me and amazes me with his masculinity. I don't think that the people that told me how much of a boy he looked like had any idea how right they were going to be. I certainly didn't. And I just hope that if this next one turns out to be another boy my nurturing skills fully take over my nature. Proving that maybe nurture is more powerful after all.

And so the circle continues...

3 comments:

  1. Just goes to show you that all boys love balls! Even their own! Ha! xxxx

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  2. I knew my Len was a 'boy' and there was very little I could do about it when he ran and skidded on his knees down a Sainsbury’s shopping aisle. Though the nice thing about boys, once you get past the nose picking and hands constantly down their pants is that when they do something sweet and sensitive it will, quite literally, make you melt.

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  3. Thank you for the link!

    I was always a nurture person until my boy came along.

    HOLY MACKEREL!

    4 kids, 4 totally different personalities and attitudes. Sometimes I feel like I just need to keep them alive and get out of their way ;)

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